Bereznak, an Intern at Gawker Media, the parent company of Gizmodo, prefaced her article with a section where she explains that what she has written may be perceived as "mean." This is a total case of "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say it at all." However, in this case, if she wanted to talk about the bad experience, she could have omitted his name and not totally invaded his privacy.
This story sounds mean. It's about a girl judging a boy because he's a nerd (like so many of us!) that she met on OkCupid.
The writer feels that because Finkel plays Magic, he's not the normal guy that she assumes he was when she initially checked out his profile. Apparently normal, suit wearing, hedge fund dudes, can't indulge their geeky sides every once and awhile. (In visiting my FLGS, I've seen plenty of suit-wearers in the Friday night Magic drafts.) The discussion of Magic was raised when Bereznak mentioned that her brother was a gamer. In the article, she quotes Finkel as having said that he participated in the game when he was younger and that he was the world champion. What she failed to mention that he became world champion in 2000. What she failed to mention is that he has won hundreds of thousands of dollars playing Magic in both single and team play.
Having been supposedly turned off by Finkel's hobby the first go around, Bereznak didn't politely agree for the two to go their separate ways. No, she went out on a second date and fired off a series of questions related to Magic.
At dinner I got straight down to it. Did he still play? "Yes." Strike one. How often? "I'm preparing for a tournament this weekend." Strike two. Who did he hang out with? "I've met all my best friends through Magic." Strike three.Why does it bother her so much that he plays this game? Did she feel threatened by his success? Did she think that because he plays with his good friends that there wouldn't be any time for a romantic relationship? She doesn't divulge the answers to these questions. She simply uses a checklist to find what she considers to be faults. The thing that grinds my gears about this is because she doesn't know shit about the game (which she fully admits). "Oh no, I don't understand it, it must be god AWFUL." That's narrow-minded and shallow thinking and she should be ashamed of herself.
I'm going to be completely honest in thinking that she went out on the second date on purpose. She probably talked to her editor about it and knew that there was potential for a story. (I'm reminded of the movie "How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days.) When it boils down to it, she was trolling on OkC while drunk and as a result decided to exploit someone as a result. Very classy, Alyssa.
I have a profile on OkCupid and I've been involved with a couple of guys from the site, one I dated for almost six months. On my profile, I include that I play D&D. Hell, I even say that I'm a blogger. Do I think that you have to divulge every bit of information about yourself in your profile? That would be absurd! What would you have to talk about when you actually found someone (that wasn't a snarky, narcissistic bitch) to go out with?
Shame on Alyssa Bereznak and her editor. Shame on Gizmodo. Shame on all people who make snap judgments about people before getting to know them.
For the record, I'd TOTALLY go on a date with Jon Finkel, Jeffrey Dahmer play and all.